Yesterday, as it became clear that we were going to lose to UConn and end our season before making the Final Four, I was proud of myself. No tears, no yelling, and only a slight bang of the table at the bar. I quickly picked myself up and focused on the positive. I was with my childhood friend and we were catching up! It was sunny out in Chicago for what felt like the first time in 6 months! I got to watch the game with other fans who really cared, giving a sense of community! <all said with semi-forced enthusiasm>People who knew how much I cared said, "I'm sorry about your team."
"I'm handling it quite well," I have said.
The more I reflect, however, the more I feel sad, and the more I feel sad, the more I feel like a crazy person who cares WAY to much about basketball.
But if I step back, I know that isn't true. I care just the right amount and probably as much as any fan who followed this past season like I did. I watched 80% of the games and followed the story lines of the players closely. I watched our team get and heal from multiple injuries, watched in horror as we lost to Illinois at home, lost to Michigan twice, lost to Aaron Craft and the Buckeyes in the last game of the regular season. I watched in disgust as Stauskas and the Wolverines took the regular season Big Ten Title. I watched Iowa's out-of-control McCabe flip Travis Trice onto the floor while sticking out his leg to ensure he tripped. I listened to the pre-season predictions and I watched frustrated fans everywhere rip on Keith Appling game after game. I watched Stauskas make 3-pointers and stare down fans as he ran down the court, throwing up his little three fingered gloat sign (see picture) as I suppressed the urge to punch my TV screen. When it comes down to it, the fact that we were one game away from the final four, and 3 games from a national championship that so many predicted we would win, just sucks. Its sad, disappointing, and if I said it didn't I'd be lying to myself.
The good about endings, though, is the opportunity to reflect on what you've learned, and set goals. At least that's what I'm going to tell myself. So here goes..
What I've learned this season:
1) A lot of my frustration with watching sports comes from a lack of ability to deal with imperfections, be patient, look at the overall picture. and to tolerate distress. This is a general pattern that I'm working on across life areas. This is why I drink while I watch sports. But when I watch at home, as I often do during the regular season games, I find myself much more intolerant of bad play.
Plan for future: When watching games at home, have distractions available, and just remind myself there is not one play that is the end of the world. Chill. Breathe.
2) No matter how stressful though, I don't regret for a second watching as many games as I did. I can proudly say I was there for the downs of the season and therefore fell more positive about the ups and more deserving of experiencing them.
Plan for future: Continue to watch the games as much as possible, and got to at least one game in person!
3) Who you watch with can be as important as anything. I was so much happier watching with a large group of people who cared, as opposed to just one or people that don't know nor care about the game. I had to restrain myself from body checking the girl who walked into the bar during the Sweet 16 game and got in my way of the TV and shouted to her friend "I don't really care about this game." Then get out, woman. OUT!
Plan for future: Avoid these people at all costs but accept that they exist and get as far away from them as possible once identified.
4) Above all, I think the most important thing I learned this season is that sports are so great because they offer a sense of community, of being part of something larger than yourself. I think that is part of what made the final loss easier this time. I mean, sure I'm sad, but so is every other committed Spartan fan, and obviously the sadness of the players and coaches is much more. We are in this together though, and that in itself, is comforting.
Plan for future: Watch with the MSU community, whenever possible.
Thanks for another great (albeit disappointing) season, MSU.
xoxo,
S.
